Q: I’m 60 years old and feeling left behind. I’ve always taken “the road less traveled,” and have seen and done many wonderful things. Yet, I see friends reaping the benefits of their long-term stability, their steady lives and their corporate jobs with retirement plans. I can’t help but compare myself to them and feel inadequate at times. How do I make peace with this?

A: It is human nature to compare ourselves with others. Sometimes we are looking for approval or how we fit in with our peers. Other times, we are checking that we aren’t overlooking some important factor to our safety or survival. Comparisons can boost our ego, reassure us, or make us gulp. Especially at the “significant numbers,” such as turning 40, 50 or 60 years old, we tend to see how we measure up. If your life has been unconventional, this comparison can feel alarming. Your inner critic will try to compare apples to oranges. The more divergent your life has been from the norm, the more judgmental your inner voice may be. When you start to get lost in comparisons, instead try the following:

First, discern your true needs. You are taking stock of your life. Stability and security are more important to you now. Take this data and act on it, but leave your self-criticism at the door. The comparisons only drain your energy. It is never too late to reinvent yourself. You have many productive years ahead. One or two sessions with a career counselor might help you find the best way to apply your skills and experiences to a situation that addresses your current needs.

Second, celebrate yourself. The gifts and lessons you have learned along your “road less traveled” have made you who you are. You likely have a wide perspective, tolerance for differences, flexibility and ingenuity. Maybe you have brought back crazy wisdom from far away places, and you blow your friends’ minds with it. You have been true to yourself, and that is worthy of celebration. Write a list of your strengths and qualities, and read it back to yourself.

You don’t have to judge your insides by other people’s outsides. Celebrate your friends’ successes if you can, and respect yourself too. Breathe deeply in the truth of all that you are. Give your nervous system a rest before the next exciting chapter of your life.