As a wealth advisor, I have a front-row seat to the process of financial decision making across a huge spectrum of personalities, family histories and balance sheets. What I find fascinating is how often time is not equated to money and therefore lavishly spent in ways that have my clients trading their precious time to save a little bit of money.

Take housework, for example. You might expect that 100% of my wealthy, retired clients have a professional housecleaner. Not true. Why not? For some it is a matter of stewardship and a desire to use those dollars for a worthier cause. That’s admirable. For others, I think it’s more about feeling unworthy of this “luxury,” especially after a lifetime of saving or other “shoulds” that become ingrained.

You might expect that 100% of my wealthy, retired clients have a professional housecleaner. Not true.

What are the tapes that play inside your head when it comes to how you spend your time? Are they tied up with the tapes about how you spend your money? It’s not surprising if they are.

Often this manifests at retirement, with a natural resistance to eject the old “Save” tape and insert a new one called “Play.”

M. Scott Peck speaks succinctly about the issue of worthiness and how we spend our time: “Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it.” (BrainyQuotes.com)

Feelings of unworthiness can cause us to undervalue saving time and overvalue saving money.

Feelings of unworthiness can cause us to undervalue saving time and overvalue saving money. “A penny saved is a penny earned” is often accepted as a truism. But if I save a penny by spending $5 in gas or, even more costly, an hour in traffic driving to the “cheaper” store, what have I really earned and at what cost? Isn’t our time worth just as much, if not more, than those few cents we saved?

The poet Libby Wagner recently stated that we all belong to the “church of busyness.” Worthiness in our society is equated with busyness, so spending our time to save money makes us feel productive and worthy. How many of us have spent hours on an airline website trying to use our mileage plan awards to get a “free” flight? Or maybe you never consider flying at all if you can drive, even if it means hours of your time behind the wheel.

Maybe it’s time to change your tapes and start enjoying a more positive relationship with your time and your money. Challenge yourself this week to break the status quo of financial decision-making and consider spending some money to save time. What’s a service you could pay someone else to do for you? Not because you can’t do it, that’s not the issue, but because you don’t have to. Your time could be spent more productively and enjoyably focused on more valuable pursuits.

Along with those “shoulds” are the dreaded “musts.” Any of these sound familiar?

Carl Sandburg cuts to the heart of this: “Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you.”

We let others do this in subtle ways, often in the form of “shoulds” that can be passed from generation to generation. If you hate housework, don’t let the fact that your mother-in-law never had a housekeeper (therefore you shouldn’t need one) keep you from hiring this out. On the other hand, if you love working in your yard, don’t judge the neighbor who hires the landscaping crew.

Along with those “shoulds” are the dreaded “musts.” Any of these sound familiar? At Christmas, I must buy everyone a carefully selected, wonderfully creative gift. Or make the dessert for Easter from scratch. Or always keep the house clean because, heaven forbid, someone might drop by and judge me for looking like I live there.

Then take one step this week toward choosing the Play tape!

If you truly enjoy these pursuits, then by all means do them with joy. Just be aware that when they become a “must,” you become chained to having your time spent by other people. You’ve met those other people in your head — Mr. and Mrs. They, next door neighbors to the Joneses. Well-intentioned, perhaps, but not who we must answer to in the end.

Money and time are treasures for us to steward faithfully and thoughtfully. These issues of worthiness, these “shoulds” we play in our head, can cause us to disregard the value of our time. Take a moment to listen to your own voice and decide how you want to use the treasures you have. Then take one step this week toward choosing the Play tape!